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So, I know it's been like thirty seconds since my last post, but I just have to add that there are people who do see past my awkward loneliness. I have spastic friends who embarrass themselves more than I embarrass them, and almost every day we talk or hang out and I feel like we only click because we're funny and sometimes creepy and try to fix each others problems with (some) seriousness (but mostly joking suggestions). But one of my friends who I was never close to and who I rarely talk to except for the occasional Facebook comments and debates that occur only because of a mutual friend, tells me:

" I know we don't know each other that well and all, but for what it's worth, what I notice about you are your wit, your wisdom, and your strength. I know you have a lot to deal with, and you're very brave. If I saw all that when we barely even see each other, I'm sure I'm not the only one. You're a first-rate human being, and believe me, it shows."

- I actually cried, it made me that happy. And then of course one of my spastic friends had to comment about how "she just stole the spotlight. *ghetto moment*". So, maybe my spastic friends are little bit harder to read, but they do care about me in their unorthodox ways, and my less close friends see stuff in me that I didn't even notice. I'm still a depressive person, but now I remember why I put up with everything.